Interesting debate. As a non-parent, I probably should keep my opinion to myself. Yet - I’m compelled to offer another angle to think about (which is something I did as an uncle whenever my nephew’s parents were struggling with an idea).
The numbers are culturally normative. As a parent, are you truly aligned with the values of your community? Do the numbers make sense?
For example, in Virginia, hunting age is 12-15; yet, R-rated films are off limits to that group. Is there an emotional difference between causing bloodshed and witnessing it?
I always wonder about the “let kids be kids” argument. What does that actually mean? Protecting their innocence? Or inhibiting their maturation? No chores? Infantilizing? Where’s the line? I say this as a fellow who left home at 17, before I even graduated high school. The guidelines seem like class-level elitism sometimes.
Love this. As a parent I struggle with this and can appreciate both perspectives. Whilst my eldest didn’t like the dramatic tension in Frozen when she was younger, her brother would be up for watching things older than his years.
Key though, regardless of the approach - having open lines of communication to engage in a dialogue with them on what content they may consume whether you want them to or not is the most important outcome I think.
Great debate! I think you both made some really good points! Dylan said it quite well when he said that we can’t very every piece of content and Todd, I loved the point you made that some more mature topics can really help a kid process. Cause life doesn’t always respect age limits, am I right?
It’s interesting to read these texts and think “yep, I see your point, makes sense”. Dylan seems to be considering, among other things, what boundaries do for the parents, with the decision-making fatigue, navigating daily complexities, conserving energy. Whereas you, Todd, lead by looking at the other side of the coin - what they do to the child (vs. for the child).
What’s striking, though, is that you both reached the same guiding idea - guidance, context, conversation, joint exploration, which I believe are the key ingredients of a strong parent-child relationship.
Probably unsurprisingly, I am all in favour of tuning in to the individual(s) in front of you. I was the kid you described and my two kids are such too. Following their interests, building on the topics they bring, sprinkling breadcrumbs for expansion of those topics… That’s the point, I believe. It’s actually so amazing to witness what they notice in the world, the connections they make in their thinking, how they make you go “whoa, I never thought about that!”. Really cool people to hang out with 😊
Interesting debate. As a non-parent, I probably should keep my opinion to myself. Yet - I’m compelled to offer another angle to think about (which is something I did as an uncle whenever my nephew’s parents were struggling with an idea).
The numbers are culturally normative. As a parent, are you truly aligned with the values of your community? Do the numbers make sense?
For example, in Virginia, hunting age is 12-15; yet, R-rated films are off limits to that group. Is there an emotional difference between causing bloodshed and witnessing it?
You get to jump in as a once kid and now adult interacting with kids. I was hoping someone would bring these two points up. Beautiful inconsistency
I always wonder about the “let kids be kids” argument. What does that actually mean? Protecting their innocence? Or inhibiting their maturation? No chores? Infantilizing? Where’s the line? I say this as a fellow who left home at 17, before I even graduated high school. The guidelines seem like class-level elitism sometimes.
Such a good point like you I’m a fanatic about precision
Love this. As a parent I struggle with this and can appreciate both perspectives. Whilst my eldest didn’t like the dramatic tension in Frozen when she was younger, her brother would be up for watching things older than his years.
Key though, regardless of the approach - having open lines of communication to engage in a dialogue with them on what content they may consume whether you want them to or not is the most important outcome I think.
Absolutely. And I think many parents are authoritarian when your way is so much more rewarding
Great debate! I think you both made some really good points! Dylan said it quite well when he said that we can’t very every piece of content and Todd, I loved the point you made that some more mature topics can really help a kid process. Cause life doesn’t always respect age limits, am I right?
It’s interesting to read these texts and think “yep, I see your point, makes sense”. Dylan seems to be considering, among other things, what boundaries do for the parents, with the decision-making fatigue, navigating daily complexities, conserving energy. Whereas you, Todd, lead by looking at the other side of the coin - what they do to the child (vs. for the child).
What’s striking, though, is that you both reached the same guiding idea - guidance, context, conversation, joint exploration, which I believe are the key ingredients of a strong parent-child relationship.
Probably unsurprisingly, I am all in favour of tuning in to the individual(s) in front of you. I was the kid you described and my two kids are such too. Following their interests, building on the topics they bring, sprinkling breadcrumbs for expansion of those topics… That’s the point, I believe. It’s actually so amazing to witness what they notice in the world, the connections they make in their thinking, how they make you go “whoa, I never thought about that!”. Really cool people to hang out with 😊