5 Comments
Feb 7Liked by Todd Kashdan

I'll preface this with - I haven't posted anything yet.

It is something that I feel creates distress and internal conflict when I consider going public and whether it would help. In my case it was I was looking to be heard, that my experience was not ok, that what I was advocating for what was right, and that I shouldn't have had to deal with what I dealt with and had the additional layers of context that were negatively impacting my life. I was told by an authority that I was the problem - which was a good lesson that just because people form a perception of you, doesn't make it true. By keeping quiet I feel like I have been silenced.

Your book Todd came out after my experience and I recognised that I had not set up my cause for success, I didn't have support and I was pushing against the status quo. I also had friends with similar experiences who wanted to put the past behind them and refused to be involved so it felt like I was fighting the good fight by myself. I'm really trying this year to pick my battles.

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I’m so sorry you dealt with this Rohan. Doesn’t matter what the particulars are. When going up against a mob of people or authority know that there are bystanders that should be jumping in at the unfair conflict. That’s what good organizations do. They have redundant checks and balances if they care about fairness and justice.

Maybe an adjunct to choosing battles carefully - create and call on your alliance? There’s so many of us willing to help fight the good fight. It’s a triple win. We feel good. You feel good. Precedent is made so others don’t go through the same struggle.

Thanks for breaking the seal and jumping in!

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Feb 7Liked by Todd Kashdan

And this is why I love your work. I love the realness (and the musical references as well). Thanks Todd.

That is a great call on creating and calling on an alliance. I'll ponder that more.

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author

Thanks 🙏.

And if we have similar musical tastes please recommend anything. Right now I’m playing this obsessively: https://open.spotify.com/track/7rIcbCJYrNqDV0kojUeEqY?si=YF5NXD7hRR2UNtR_qV6LTg

I love that it has about six songs in one.

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Once again, a mindfully, brilliant, take a pause, and use your critical, thinking, awareness, and acceptance that not everybody in the world wants to hear about your irritable bowel syndrome! Well done. This post is a gigantic keeper.

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